So, let’s talk about university…

I heard all the rumours about university and what to expect way before I wrote my personal statement. I was warned about the parties, the excessive drinking, the drugs, the friendships that would be built and broken, and of course… the opposite sex.

Firstly, I want to talk about friends. I knew I’d make friends when I got to uni, and I’m sure that’s something everyone hopes for. But these people that you call ‘friends’, are they really your friends? Are they there for you when you really need them or only when you look buff enough for the ‘squad pic’. Do they urge you to go to church or fellowship together? Can you have intellectual conversations with them and tell them about your problems, or do they only entertain conversations that involve the opposite sex, materialistic things, or bitching about other girls/boys. Do they even wish you luck on your phase test, upcoming exam or the essay you’re about to write?

Friends shouldn’t just be friends because it’s convenient or because you all look good together in a picture. They should be your friends because they impact you positively and have the right intentions for you. I was lucky enough to find those kinds of friends in my first term at uni and hopefully you did/will too. But in order to do so, you really need to go into uni with the right mind-set. It’s not every day focus on raves, squad pics and getting over 100 likes on Instagram or 100 favourites on twitter. It’s not every day only find friends who are bait to make you bait by default. Sometimes find friends who know how to have fun at all these raves AND get firsts at uni while encouraging you to do the same.

I’ve heard about people coming into uni and forming a large friendship group and before the end of the term/year it’s turned into several groups of twos or threes. That’s definitely something I didn’t want for myself, so like many, Instead of trying to be part of a massive squad, I looked for like-minded people similar to myself. That might mean a small group of three or four but it allows you more chance to get to know each other intimately and less chance for arguments as a result of ‘he said she said’ rumours etc… Now, I’m not saying there’s something wrong with knowing a lot of people, by all means get along with as many people as possible. All I’m saying is don’t use the word ‘friend’ loosely… Know the company you keep. If you find yourself in the wrong crowd or in a friendship group you’re not comfortable with, it’s simple… TAKE YOURSELF OUT! There’s no point being unhappy or feeling some type of way in uni when there are plenty other people you could meet and actually form a great friendship with! University is an experience which should be enjoyed with every moment.  Don’t ruin that experience because ‘life is easier sticking with these ‘friends’’.

Now for the good bit… We’ve all heard the rumours about this so called Netflix that the two of you are apparently going to watch… just make sure before he/she comes round its really Netflix you’re going to be watching init. Also, make sure when they say ‘let’s chill’ you’re really going to JUST chill! If you’ve got intentions of doing more make it clear from the start.

This brings me to the topic we love so much… the ‘baby boy’ and/or ‘baby girl’. So, we’ve all at least once if not many times come across a baby boy/girl, and if you haven’t, well, then it’s probably you gg.

I’m not going to go into depths about the logistics of being a baby boy or baby girl, but excluding the odd few who set out to have this persona, many came to uni and basically threw home training out the window. There’s nothing wrong with having a bit of fun, but do so with self-respect and if anything respect for those who raised you (I’m sure we can all agree on that one). I get the whole Idea of having a ‘fresh start’ trust me I know, anyone who knows me knows I’ve lived in a lot of places and a fresh start can be exactly what you need at just the right time. But you shouldn’t come to university thinking ‘I’m going to change who I really am’ be yourself, because if you’re anything but, trust me, people will notice. Also, coming to uni means FREEDOM, you can go in and come out when you want, do what you want, see who you want and say what you want… but again, do so with self-respect.

Now, I’ve got a message for both females and males.

To the girls:

To the boys:

To both male and female:

So, in terms of friends and the opposite sex, one of the main things I think we all need to consider is that we’ve only known these people for a short amount of time, we can’t just trust ANYONE. Be careful WHO you say things to and be careful WHAT you say.